Along Came Liz

I stayed with grands for a while but mom and dad came back.  Grands had bought a house at "913" N Central - right next to a railroad track - that they used for my aunt and uncle with the 4 boys.  I am sure they needed space and anytime parents came back for kids, they needed that place to tuck them - temporarily - because it was never going to be long, it never was.  They boys had ended up in an orphanage, and aunt Con and Uncle Vic had moved on. So mom and dad went to "913" to stay - so for now, we had a stable place that we weren't getting booted out of.

Did I say NEXT to a railroad track?  I think there might of 20 yards to the track.  Do you remember "I Love Lucy" in a hotel on the tracks?  With the bed bouncing across the floor when the train passed?  Yep, that was us.  We stayed there for a bit over a year.  Then mom found out she was pregnant again and Connie and Vic had come back, the boys went with them, so 'our' place was now theirs again.  But... 

Grands bought another house on 813 N Alabama.  It was old with plaster and horse hair walls.  It had lathe in the walls, and wood floors, and it was the best place I had ever lived in other than the 'ranch' in Colorado.  It was bigger than the ranch house and it was near grands - my base camp.  I knew we would be ok now.  This one was almost 'ours' because grands owned it.  They paid $5,000 for that place.  It was old, and it was theirs, so we had 'stable'. 

When I was almost 8, my baby sister Elizabeth came along.  Mom and dad were still on and off again trying to stay married.  Most of the time my ‘home base’ was with grands and the boys.  It was probably when Liz was born that I realized I wasn’t a boy.  Grands would holler for ‘us’ boys to come and eat and I came right along with Roger, John Dee, Phillip and Billy.  If you haven't figured it out, we were like one big huge family that rotated out of grands place.  

So when Liz was born, I stayed home a bit more to help care for her.  I loved my sister dearly - after all, she was younger than me and not a boy.  She was soft and cuddly and I just adored her and the attention she brought with everyone looking at her beautiful, tiny face.  

Mom and dad were still struggling (fighting) when they were together and I am sure I didn’t like the tension.  Grands place was 5 straight neighborhood blocks away - and as soon as I figured she was old enough, I started walking her to grands.  I was too young to realize the dangers, mom was caught up in her own misery, and she hated us hearing her and dad argue, so she allowed it.  We didn’t have a phone or a tv, and thankfully our little town was quiet so we always made it the 5 blocks.  

I loved my little sister.  It gave me something to concentrate on other than my (missing) cousins, my parent's arguing, my dad's philandering with other women and my mom's crying. She was so sad and broken.  I have no idea how my mom made it through all the crap.  My mom was a miserable mess; she had been adopted and barely saw her adoptive family, (my dad saw to that), so there was no support from anyone.

She had dad's parents (my grandparents), but they were on dad's side because of his lies.  And he lied about everything.  He was a habitual liar and, honestly, he could not tell truth from his lies.  They melted into the same for him.  So I guess what I am leading to my mom had zero support.  Zero.  

I got to where I would take my baby sister to the park, to grands, just outside... anything to keep her out of the turmoil going on in our lives.

Remember I said my mom was pregnant again?  Imagine her being pregnant again, with no support, with a husband that was fooling around on her and with two children.  She was also convinced with this pregnancy that there was definitely something wrong.  I am sure she had flashbacks from the baby she lost in Colorado, but she knew there was something different going on this time.  She cried.  She told everyone but she was blown off.  I am not sure she even went to a Dr.  Dad was... dad... he paid no bills, he lied and he moved because he paid no bills!  How could she have even gone to a Dr?

The rest of this story coming in another post.  Hopefully, sooner that they have been.

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Digging out of a depression is difficult, to say the least.  In 4 months, I have had my bestie move to another state, a terrible fall, a concussion, post concussion syndrome, headaches from you-know-where, sinus surgery, 2 major holidays and a major storm.  Be patient with me.  I think I may see the light at the end of the tunnel, but who knows?  At least I have something the write about for my kids to see someday!