This Just Sucks! :-(

Most women find being with their hubby's overwhelming after a few days. Steve and I are not like that - we can spend all our time together and not get tired of each other. We simply like being with each other. I truly married my life mate and I hope he feels the same way.

Sure there were hard times along the road, but we made it through them and persevered. We fought the battle and we won - and we are still happy together and hope to grow really old holding each others' hand.

This weekend was a quiet one. We were both quiet. Both knew he was leaving today and there was so much to say, yet neither of us spoke much. I know it is hard on him leaving his home with all of this going on - to fly half a world away. It will not be easy to contact him if we have questions and it will be difficult on him not knowing... not knowing how I am doing, not knowing how project rebuild is going and not knowing what the outcome looks like.

I am thankful he stayed as long as he did. There was so much to do and so much we still did not get done - but we gave it our all and did what we could. Now it is up to me and the contractors to finish. What an overwhelming thought.

This is what I feel like:



I know I can do it - I have done so many things I thought I could not do. But doing this is so much bigger than anything I have ever done. I am responsible for the camper, for the crew, for the house and for myself. I have to finish rounding up the rest of the stuff we need, keep receipts in order, work with the insurance company and the normal stuff like pay bills and grocery shop. And I still do not feel well. Ha! Like I even have time to think of that right now :-(

Anyway, I feel alone. I know there are people around, but everyone has their own life - and the reality is, this is mine. One step at a time, one step at a time ;-)

Wish me luck. Today, I feel overwhelmed and missing my guy. It has only been 4 hours. Pulling my shoulders up, drying my tears and buckling down to business. I have no time for a pity party.

But I can stomp my foot and say "This just sucks!" Right?